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emily's autobiography

from tulip by strumi

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lyrics

I know you’ll act like this isn’t happening, you’ve been doing that forever
But it’s here to stay whether you like it or not
I don’t care if you think it’s wrong you think it’s gone it’s never gonna die
And you can wait forever with all that pressure, this time I’m not giving up
All the things I hid, all the lies I told they were so you didn’t throw another pity party

But now, it’s my turn to say what I’ve needed to say
“you were wrong about me, over and over again”
And now I will stand up, for myself for once
I’m so tired of feeling put down, drowned out, never taken seriously
It’s my life it’s not right

Do you know Emily?
I’ve been writing her autobiography for four years
And it’s coming together beautifully

I tried to suffocate all these incongruent feelings
I tried to pretend to be conveniently perfect
But it felt like lies, it felt like I was dying
I couldn’t be the one you needed
The person you always dreamed I’d become
Because I have dreams of my own
I know now the person I should be
And she’s far away from here
Will she be far away from you?

credits

from tulip, released March 25, 2020

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strumi Pennsylvania

it's venting, or maybe it's art or it might just be noise, or a waste of time, perhaps it is sacrilege, you tell me.

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